A Life Worth Living by Nancy Buxton

Archive for September, 2010

An Ahhh–haaa Moment

Well, you know what I mean, you know aha–something  just came to me and I think I am right on.  Now listen to this.  You know how we have been talking about our belief window?  Here is what I think about mine.

First let me say, my parents made me feel loved beyond love.  I always felt like I was very important to them and that I was the apple of their eye.  (This fact and what I am about to tell you makes me wonder is knowing you are loved the most important thing ? IDK). But. . .  my mom had a little poem she would quote to me. . .”There was a little girl who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead and when she was good she was very good but when she was bad she was horrid.”  Considering that I was pretty much a brat, I was bad and horrid most of the time. 

When I became a teenager my mom switched her quote to, “Pretty is as pretty does.”  Well. . . .since I was horrid most of the time I never felt very pretty.  Which bring me back to my belief window, I see myself as fairly unattractive.  Or do I?  It seems to me I have a good self-esteem.  Did I get the good self-esteem because I knew I was loved?  Maybe!

Have you taken a look at your own window?  The book says, “Each of us sees the world through a window on which we have written the principles we believe to be true.  Where those principles are true, the view through our window is clear; where they are false, the view is misleading.”

So……..YOU can be in control of your life, depending on the truth of the principles by which you choose to live it.

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It’s a Crazy World

Have you ever noticed how odd people are?  Now, not me you understand.  I am not odd, not odd at all.  Or am I?  No I don’t think so.  I mean is it odd that I really hate to talk on the phone?  I love reading the Old Testament.  I like collard greens.  I am crazy about children, but I don’t want to take any of them home with me (except my own).  I love to cook.  I feel lonely even at my own church.  I don’t like to travel.  I really like to just be home. I love shoes but seem to wear the same ones all the time.  Do you think these things are odd?

Let me tell you another odd thing.  My grand-daughter was asked to take her pony tail bands off her wrist.  Is that odd to you?  Since when have we decided to worry about a ponytail holder in place of pointing out the joy of knowing Jesus.  Okay, okay maybe I am being harsh, I know her school teaches about Jesus, but I wonder if a ponytail band would make Jesus want to set this girl straight.  I doubt it.

Where does it start and where does it stop?  What should we worry about and what should we let go?  Why can I wear a glitzy belt but if I move it a few inches up to my neck it is considered wrong.  And, if I were a student I would be asked to remove it.  Now that I am an adult I would probably be fired.  I don’t get it.

Will it ever change or are we always going to pick at the sliver and skip over the post?

The Girl who Thought She Was Ugly

I don’t like the word ugly.  Actually there are a few words I don’t like, dork, bored, ugly, I don’t care, hate and using the Lords name in vain, are just a few of the words I don’t care to hear.

Back to the girl. . .think of it like this what if somewhere, sometime, someone you trusted told you that you were ugly.  Suppose you agreed that you were ugly and you put it in your belief window.  Would it make a difference?  You bet it would.

I remember Florence Littauer talking about a girl named Greta and how her mother never gave her the silver box of saying Greta was beautiful.  Greta looked for affirmation from her mother until her mother’s dying day.

The story is told of a very attractive girl, one you would notice when she walked into the room.  The only problem with this girl’s looks was that she never smiled.  This girl was convinced that she was ugly.  Her mother told her how ugly she was almost every day.

She would never accept the idea that she  was attractive, and her self-esteem was low and affecting her relationships.  You see when her boyfriend would tell her she was attractive, her window told her, he is either lying or he is too stupid to realize how ugly she really is.

By accepting her mother’s words about her looks and putting it on her window, this woman has given her mother control over this aspect of her life.  She could not take control herself until she replaced her mother’s principle with one of her own.

What about you and me, do we have a belief window with some untrue things in it.  I think we do.  Think about this:

What statements about your self-image do you have on your window? Where did they come from?  How might they be challenged?

Belief Window

So, what does your belief window look like?  I haven’t figured mine out yet.  But, here’s an example.  Take for instance Mother Teresa, her belief window looked like this:  The lowliest human being was worth saving, was worth taking care of, was worth putting yourself out for.  The men who started the KKK, their belief window looked totally different, if you were black you were not worth anything.

We each have a belief window and that’s how we see the world. Now I know most of us are not Mother Teresa or Klansmen, but the idea still applies to us.  Once we have a belief written on our window, it determines our behavior.

You can imagine a belief window can be very helpful or it can be detrimental depending on the accuracy.  The book says: The first step toward taking control of your life is taking a good look at what’s on your window and accepting the possibility that some of the things on it are wrong.

Okay, that’s it for today.  Tomorrow I have a story to tell you that will illustrate a belief window that is not accurate.

I leave you with “The Alcoholic’s Prayer.”

Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Everyone Wants to Be in Control

We all seek to control our lives, our careers, relationships and most everything else.  If we can get control we should have a better life.  So they say.

Rylin made her choice umbrella, sandals, and upside down sunglasses.

Fact:  My life is the result of all the choices I have made.  IF I can control the process of choosing, I can take control of my life.  IDK this sounds complicated to me.

The purpose of this book is to explore the choosing process, to help me understand how it wors, and then to arm me with a tool that will enable me to see the consequences of my choices.

Then the book says: “That’s all there is to it.”

I will keep you posted as I wade through this little book–I have a hunch they have left out one important part–prayer.  Pray about everthing.

What about my weight I pray about that, and then I eat.  Hummmmmmmm I think I will read the book.  God gave me the power of choice perhaps I can find a clue on making good choices.

Learn to Monitor Your Mind

This week was the first day of piano lessons for the school year.  26 students, give or take a couple who forgot their books, sat on my piano bench this week.  I am crazy about each of them, and they come in all sizes and colors.  Most all of my students are funny and would just as soon talk as play the piano.

Today one of my beginning students had something very worth while to say.  He informed me that he has to protect his mind because he can’t sleep.  If he reads a book about snakes it keeps him awake.  Of course, I had to take the golden opportunity to explain how as an adult I have to guard my mind too.

I am pleased that his parents have explained the importance of self-control when it comes to what he puts in his mind.  I had to smile when he told me he thought he would read his piano book before going to bed, he didn’t think that would keep him awake.

Just to Know Him

I already knew this, why has it taken me so long to really comprehend the idea that if I want to hear from God I have to stay close to Him.  Oh be quiet, I can hear you say right now, “no dah.”  Well, have you thought about it?  I mean really thought about it?

There are two people who I know who really do seem to hear from God on a fairly regular basis.  Both of these ladies have a very close relationship with the Lord.  Close relationship does not mean, saying your usual prayer and reading your usual 2 chapters of the Bible.  It means thinking about Jesus, studying, spending time with Him and praying about everything.  Even more than that it means communicating with Him as your best friend.  Then and only then will we hear directly from Him.

I lost my cell phone on my way home from the Rocky Mountain Retreat, I asked the Lord right then and there to help me find it.  I haven’t heard from Him so I think it’s lost forever. (The first phone I have ever paid extra for)  I wonder if I knew Him better would He have told me where I left the phone.  IDK

My dream is not about finding phones, or even getting rich, it’s about hearing from God.  Making Him my best friend.  I want that, I want Him to trust me to witness for Him.  I want Him to ask me to do odd things, to ask me to stretch my brain, to . . .to. . .well, to do what ever it is that He wants me to do.

Right now I am headed to Sprint to buy a new phone.

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