A Life Worth Living by Nancy Buxton

Archive for the ‘marriage’ Category

The Anniversary

What to say.  Married 43 years and not much to say about it.  Well, that’s not exactly true, there is plenty to say.  I can tell you 43 years has gone by quick and yet slow.  Have you ever heard that days go slow but the years go fast?  This was really true when the kids were small, sometimes those days would just drag by until daddy came home and, and, and eat supper and watch tv until bed time. LOL

That’s how it use to be, husbands didn’t help out like they do now.  I wonder why that was.  My fella would at least put the kids to bed, he almost always did that.  I gave them the bath, got the pj’s on and he would slip into the bedroom and stay with them until they would fall asleep.  Funny thing is, that seems to be the thing the kids remember.  They don’t remember all the baths, they remember dad going to bed with them and talking until they fell asleep, all three of them.

So what did we get each other?  Welllllllllllllllllllllllllll, I told Bob to skip the present there is nothing I want and the VitaMix was pretty expensive for Mother’s Day.  What did I get him? Flowers.  Yup, I did.  He told me one time when I was wishing for flowers that I have never gotten him flowers, so I fooled him and did it.  Here’s the kicker, after a few days I asked him how he liked his flowers, he said, “What flowers?”  Funny, isn’t it?  Oh well, I have enjoyed the flowers, I’m not sure he thinks of them as his.  Who knows.

So do you have the picture?  No gifts, no cards, well except for flowers.  We did go out to eat with four other people and we went to the university dairy for an ice cream cone.  You know what? It was perfect, really it’s just nice to be happy, healthy and still seeking Jesus.

This Morning

It was about 6:00 am and I just turned over in bed and I heard a voice say, “Happy Anniversary.”  LOL  If you knew my man you would know he is never awake much less aware of much at 6:00 am. 

Yup, 43 years of marriage.  You already know it isn’t always perfect.  He can “tick” me off and yet I have noticed the older we get the easier it is.  Praise the Lord.  Don’t get me wrong it has never been exactly hard but we certainly come from different backgrounds.

I remember reading, way back when we were first married and I was not sure I was really happy, something like this: The more you dwell on your unhappiness the more unhappy you become.  Make the best of your decision and decide to be happy.  Take it to the Lord in prayer.  Now that is not exactly how it read but it was good advice that’s for sure.

Here is the Thai Peanut Sauce that goes with the Lettuce Wraps from yesterday.  Not everyone will like this, but we do and Bob is not exactly adventuresome in his eating.

This would be good drizzled over stir fried vegetable or over the rice recipe I will give you next week.  Be sure you use natural peanut butter with no added sugar and NO partially hydrogenated oil.

5 TBS. peanut butter

3 Tbs. water

1 Tbs. soy sauce

3 Tbs. fresh lime juice

2 tsp. honey–maybe 3

2 cloves garlic, peeled

1.16 tsp. salt

1/16 tsp. cayenne pepper

Put it in the blender and blend on  high until smooth and creamy.  Refrigerate until using.  Warm the sauce in a microwave before serving.  Leftover sauce freezes well.  1 Tbs. 46 Calories

He Loves Me He Loves Me Not. . . . .

Several years ago the phone woke me out of a deep sleep, it was a dear friend.  Do you have a close friend who all she has to do is say hi and you know instantly something is wrong?  I knew something was really wrong when I heard her greeting.  I asked the dreaded question, “what’s wrong?”

After many years of marriage her husband had found someone else–she made him laugh.  My friend and I have spent many hours on the phone we have hashed it over and over and over.

I don’t know why it happened, I love my friend I think she would be the ideal wife, but something went wrong.

Today I want to give you some thoughts on things you can do for your husband.  Many of these ideas come from Elizabeth Georg’s book, On Being a Godly Wife.

1.  Pray for him daily–pray about his success, his spiritual life, and anything else that comes to mind.

2.  Plan for him daily–plan a date night now and then, make his favorite meal, pick up the house a little before he gets home.  Leave a little note on the door or put a quick note in his lunch.

3.  Please him–pay attention to what he likes and dislikes, my husband hates washing his hands in the kitchen and not finding a towel to dry with, I try to keep a towel handy just for him.  I would really rather have everything off the counter.

4. Protect your time with him.–Make your husband your number one human priority.

5.  Physically love him–I Corinthians 7:3-5

6.  Positively respond to him.  Say yes as often as you can, he may want you to ride along to Home Depot and you would rather stay home.  Go!

7.  Praise Him–thank him for what he does, tell him how much you appreciate him.

Tomorrow. . .

Tomorrow is my 42nd anniversary.  I know you don’t think I am old enough to be married that long, I know what you mean, I don’t feel old enough to be married that long either.  But, when you think about it, we have two grown children and six, yes I said six, grandchildren.  I guess we are both old enough.

Have I told you the story?  The first time I saw him was at a birthday party, he looked pretty cute to me and his shoes were polished and he dressed well.  After dating for a few weeks I decided to take him home to meet the parents.  Here is one thing I noticed about him.  He didn’t have a temper.  My father had a quick temper and most any thing could set him off.  While on this home leave my mother had a box of apples she wanted brought into the house and my man picked up the box and the bottom fell out and the apples flew every where.  I naturally waited for the nasty words to escape his mouth and he just simply fix the bottom and picked up the apples.  This was as odd as wearing a coat in July.  I had never seen a man react so mildly to this seemingly awful thing.

Well, I didn’t base marrying Bob on this act alone but I can tell you this, I have never seen him discipline our children in anger.  I have never heard him yell at our children or me because he was angry or for any other reason.  I appreciate his patience in dealing with a wife who mostly thinks she knows it all.  He is the calming force at our house, he is the patient get ‘er done kind of guy.  I am the slam bam thank you mam, always in a hurry, I accomplish a lot but it is not usually perfect.  What a pair we are.

I thank God that he took my decision of marriage, with out a thought of praying about it, and has helped two totally different people make a home and  a happy life together

So, Happy Anniversary to my man, our children and grandchildren, it is fun to celebrate life together.

Have You Seen This?

I love this video!  It just reminds me how marriage should be and can be.  This couple has been married 62 years and he just turned 90.  I just bet they have had a lot of fun together. I would imagine they had a great time raising children and enjoying the music of life.

You know we are to be joyful, we are to sing a glad song.  Do you have joy in your home?  Joy is one of the greatest gifts we can give to our children and grandchildren.  Make a joyful noise my sisters, it is more fun then being a grump.

A Love Story!

We were invited to a 40th anniversary party and what fun it was!  We had a lovely meal (I should say every one else had a lovely meal), and saw friends we had not seen for a very long time.   We were all together last evening and it was an evening of visiting, fun and surprises. We even had entertainment!

The “groom” sang to the “bride”!  As the meal was just finishing up with strawberry short cake, Elvis appeared singing, “I Just Can’t Help Falling in Love With You.”  The program was a surprise to the “bride”, he sang a couple more songs and then he had planned a slide presentation that was lovely.

You may be wondering why I’m telling you this.  Well, I was struck with the word committment.  I am always so grateful when a marriage lasts through thick and thin. It is such a good example to young people today who are just starting out.

These two were older when they were married and he really didn’t want to get married again as he had already been through a divorce but she talked him into it.  At the end of the slide show the words on the screen said, “And They Lived Happily Ever After.”

If you are married  you know living happily ever after does not just happen.  I’m sure these two would be the first to tell you they have  had to work on their marriage, each giving 101 percent.

If you are struggling in your marriage I recommend Kevin Lehman’s books. Be prepared he talks a lot about S E X,  he has some very good advice.

Marriage is a wonderful thing and I pray yours is faboo, if it isn’t do something about it.  Spend some time in prayer, read some books, find a good counselor, confide in a friend who does have a good marriage.  We can learn a lot from each other.  I don’t mean tell your friend all about your troubles but ask her what they are doing to make their marriage successful.

Have a great Monday, today I will go weigh and they will measure my progress I’ll let you know how I’m doing by tomorrow.

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